For some, there is no more precious commodity during the current COVID-19 pandemic than toilet paper. Sure, skip the canned goods, produce, and bread, but TP? Clear the shelves! Well, filmmaker James Gunn apparently didn’t stock up on enough of the perforated paper product before coronavirus panic led to a shortage, and now he’s being forced to wipe his behind with… Michael Rooker’s face.
To be clear, that’s novelty toilet paper with the actor’s charming mug printed on it. Gunn and Rooker are long-time collaborators, with the Guardians of the Galaxy writer-director casting the actor in all of his movies, including the upcoming The Suicide Squad. Despite their real-life bromance, however, they have long acted like phony frenemies in public. In fact, Gunn tries to find a way to kill Rooker in nearly all of his films.
Even the toilet paper originated as something of a prank between the pair. “I bought a bunch of these rolls of toilet paper as a joke when Rooker came over for Christmas a couple years ago,” Gunn wrote on Twitter. “I put them in all the bathrooms of the house. I never thought we were actually going to have to use them, but here we are.”
Look, if the worst thing Gunn is dealing with right now is putting Rooker’s face between his butt cheeks, he’s doing just fine. His The Suicide Squad actor Idris Elba recently tested positive for coronavirus. And he was in Cats. (Elba is doing fine, by the way, which opens up a whole other conversation about wealthy people having access to testing that regular folks don’t, but that’s neither here nor there.)
I bought a bunch of these rolls of toilet paper as a joke when Rooker came over for Christmas a couple years ago – I put them in all the bathrooms of the house. I never thought we were actually going to have to use them, but here we are. 😞 pic.twitter.com/0vC1q3CsO3
— James Gunn (@JamesGunn) March 25, 2020